Goat's Pine Box a la Mode©

Online Vampire Stories

Written by American Author Sky Taylor

Goat lived in a valley that was sparsely clothed with pines, red cedars, and sumac that turned a vivid red each autumn.  As so was the season, for autumn had settled in for a brief visit that soon would welcome winter.

The valley wasn’t a well-populated area, though every now and then a few visitors would drop in to admire the moon and stars.  Away from the overpowering lights of the city, the sky transformed into an enchanting black cave of diamonds.

Sometimes the city people would leave edible goodies behind.  He had especially enjoyed the taco salad that the blond-headed lady had left there last week.

 The hot salsa had added a kick that was quite enjoyable for a change.  Exotic foods had a certain appeal to them, Goat thought in recollection.

Night was still far away, several hours before the warm face of the sun would vanish.  Goat was content, enjoying an afternoon brunch of fallen pine that was scattered about the north end of the valley.  

He’d never ventured this far into the valley, for his herd preferred the east.  The sunrise came sooner there, making it easier to view edible treasures of nature at first light.  

Goat had never found pine to be so tender as this current feast.  He made a mental note to experiment with the pine on the east side of the valley that evening.

The vampire’s eyes sprung open like a window shade that had been released too swiftly.

What was that noise?  Whatever it was, it was virtually on top of his coffin. 

Surely, not humans?  He’d only arrived just before daybreak this morning.  Too soon to be hunted.

He tensed as a loud thud sounded once again on top of the coffin.  Someone, or something was rapping, as if they were trying to steal their way into his safe lair.

The vampire twisted his head, the blackness of the cushioned cocoon surrounding him as he attempted to hone in on a voice.  One advantage of being a vampire was his capability of picking up the slightest of sounds. 

So he lay there.  Listening.  Quiet as a mouse.

Then he heard something….a munching – as if someone were eating.

The vampire must have strained his neck a bit too hard for a raw ache shot up the length, tunneling into the base of his skull.  

He eased out a deep moan, yearning to draw a hand up to his neck and soothe away the pain.  But in the confined area of the coffin, that was out of the question.

Another loud thud pronounced from above onto the coffin.

A pick?  A shovel?  It was becoming painfully obvious that someone was trying to reach him.

Perhaps to destroy him?

Again, the vampire twisted his head to one side, more gingerly now than before, to see if he could pick up a slight sound.  One arc of light would be his demise.  Would the pine wood of the coffin hold up to the stress being thrust upon its face?

He silently cursed his ignorance.  He should have allowed more time for getting situated into his new home. On the other hand, he'd had little choice.  In the last village, he’d taken thirteen victims, and had barely escaped in the night.  He had attempted to cover his tracks, and to choose his temporary location wisely.  It appeared he had failed.

If the mob hadn’t been so swift in their anger, there would have been time to bury deeper into the ground.  And if they hadn’t taken out his servant, he would have assured that the coffin was well beyond discovery.   

If he had not prepared a secret passageway, the vampire was certain that he would have been no more, just as his faithful servant.

Crunching, eating.  Yes, someone was eating.  Atrocious manners, too.

Goat paused from his munching, then pawed on the pine beneath him.  It sounded hollow. Perhaps the pine contained an arsenal of other scrumptious goodies!  Tin cans, broken glass – he wasn’t picky.  

He bashed his hoof hard onto the pine, without success.  My, he was feeling a bit warm due to his physical efforts.  It was good that it wasn’t a hot summer day.

Determined to break into pine to see what lay beyond, Goat began pouncing hard onto the soft wood.  Dancing.  Kicking.  Jumping.  Hard now.

My, it was growing very hot now.  Goat felt exhausted and eased out a soft bleat, "Baaaaa."

The vampire widened his eyes.  Baaaaa?  A lost baby?  A sheep perhaps?

Goat bleated again, "Baaaaa."

A goat!  There was a goat on his box, the vampire suddenly realized.

"Go away!" he screamed out, as loud as possible, now that he knew he wasn’t dealing with a human threat.

Goat twisted his head to the left, then to the right.  It was a city person!  A city person was behind his pine!  

Perhaps they had goodies to share?  Perhaps a taco salad?  With salsa, he thought, his tummy suddenly doing belly flips.

Filled with total glee, Goat began pouncing on the box harder than ever before.  He lunged.  He clipped.  He clopped.  He hopped.  Very hard, too.

"Stop!  You idiot goat!"

"Goat?" Goat questioned, pausing from his efforts.  "What a good sign," he decided.  "The city person obviously knew him.  Perhaps the nice and generous blond-headed lady was playing a game with him," he happily thought.

Goat jumped so high into the air, he looked like he had been thrown from a springboard.  

The vampire yelled so loud that his mouth was bigger than his face.  "Stop, you idiot!"

But it was too late.  Goat landed and a huge crash followed.

Something was terribly wrong, he decided, running to peer at the contents of the pine from afar.  

A curtain of smoke filled the valley, Goat barely making out the shape of a city person. Then suddenly, the form vanished before him.

Goat was sad.  He had wanted a taco salad so badly.  He had wanted to see his nice blond-headed lady.

That evening, Goat got his wish.  At midnight, the blond-headed lady appeared in the valley in a red car that was missing a top. This time, she left him a sour cream and onion burrito.

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